When Dreams Become Idols

Very recently I had a wakeup call. Yes I was still dreaming. Yes, sometimes I was sleeping and sometimes I was awake, but looming before my physical eyes and my internal eyes were my desires and goals. You see I’ve been planning to do great things in, and with my life since childhood. Alone inside my mind I knew I would marry and have 2.5 maybe 3 children. LOL!! (If you read statistics in science journals etc. sometimes their numbers are like that when describing how many people are guilty of doing certain things or having certain traits. I’m still trying to understand how you end up with half a person, at least on paper.) I also planned to record my songs even though at 10 years old I hadn’t yet written any. I had no intentions of becoming a preacher or pastor or anyone wearing a robe etc. I like colors and different styles and shoes . . . oh the shoes oh soooo much. So to be a preacher restricted to a robe was just not in my thoughts at all. Evangelist and prophet – okay and maybe because the ones I grew up seeing and knowing wore some great outfits and hats and yes, shoes . . . I think that’s what made it so exciting for me. The shoes. But anyhoooo, let’s move on to why I’m at this place again this week.

When a child dreams, she (or he, but I can only speak from my point of view of being a “she”, so men please don’t get offended or feel left out. Stay with me. Remember, it’s my story. J) sees something bigger and greater than herself at that moment in time. It’s beyond her reach and grasp, but because she has not yet been lied to that she “can’t do this” and “can’t do that”, or at least she is so rebellious inside that she rejects those negative assignments sent her way, she believes beyond belief that she can, and will attain that for which her heart longs. It’s like, for me anyway, standing under the Eiffel Tower and believing “one day I’m going to the top” before elevators and stairs are even invented. And then growing up and 20+ years later being able to take the elevator or stairs and going to the top! Either way, whether as a child or an adult, that Eiffel Tower whether with stairs or not, still is as tall and large as it has been and always will be. Can you see the words coming out of my mouth? LOL!! Okay, I’ll try to simplify it a little more. Hang in there.

For more than 20 years I’ve been trying to accomplish some things with my life, and each time I seem to have come close to it, it seems to slip away. Much prayer and introspection, releasing and receiving, researching and studying, giving up and trying again have occurred just to accomplish what has been, and is simple for so many others who have traversed every continent on the earth since the beginning of time. So why not for, and with me?

Day in and out, waking and sleeping I have dreamed of this and that, and so have many of you, so you do know what I’m talking about. Many of us who grew up in the church were taught “idol hands, I mean idle hands are the devil’s workshop” meaning if you’re sitting around with nothing to do and too much time on your hands, you’re probably up to no good, or “know” good. Hmmm. Three m’s that time. Sometimes we were asked “what you know good?” (If you try to say it correctly it doesn’t work, so please don’t try to correct my English. J I’m sharing with you not only the ‘text’ but the ‘context’ so you can at least envision where we were at that time.) So we were taught that we needed to keep busy doing something. Of course that verse is nowhere in the Bible, at least I’ve not found it yet. If you do, please send it to me. Anyhoooo, a verse of scripture in the Bible that has “saved” many and tripped up more, because of lack of understanding, says, “Where there is no vision [no redemptive revelation of God], the people perish; but he/she who keeps the law [of God, which includes that of man] – blessed (happy, fortunate, and enviable) is he/she.” Proverbs 29:18 (Amplified Bible). Now the Amplified hasn’t always been around so many of us did not grow up reading it and getting the understanding needed to rightly apply this verse to our lives. However, one day I was reading this in the King James Version and I just was not satisfied with it, so I began to research key words in this verse such as “vision” and “perish” in the Hebrew, the language of Proverbs. The Hebrew word for ‘perish’ is para meaning to loosen, implying to expose, dismiss; figuratively to bare and make naked, uncover. O-Kay. Now my eyes were opened, again.

Defined above “Vision” means - a redemptive revelation. To redeem means to “buy back”, to purchase to save or rescue. Revelation is information, a picture of the future, the present, the past to give understanding, to remove the scales from our eyes, to give greater understanding and a clearer picture. Like wearing corrective glasses for astigmatism or nearsightedness; only like. So, once I understood this verse after my research I held onto my childhood dreams and goals more than ever. I did not want to go through this life without a “vision” – a picture or some direction for my life. I didn’t want my life to be uncovered, naked, with no purpose. Para - perish: means you’ve done more than loosened your shoe laces or unbuttoned your shirt and slacks, but you’ve actually taken them off and you’re walking around with nothing on!

Okay, let’s put it like this. I’ve met so many people on this European continent who did not go to college after high school and all they do is smoke cigarettes, meet in bars and go to clubs, movies and karaoke places. They may or may not have jobs, for they may be living home with their parents still. They do a lot of reading, but no writing of their own. They did not study musical instruments or voice in school, but they sure would like to sing like Mariah Carey, or dance naked like Beyonce and Lady Gaga. (What’s a gaga?) When you ask them about having a dream or goal for their lives, they talk about other celebrities and what they’ve done or are doing, but for themselves it’s only a wish, not a possibility. They’ve never had before their eyes something great to aspire to achieve with, and through their own lives. No great insurmountable mountain that excited and motivated them rather than discouraged them. This has never before been my problem. I’ve always had before me dreams and goals and I was not afraid to drive, hike, walk, hitchhike (not literally), crawl, run etc. TOWARDS my dreams and goals. But somewhere along the way, I became obsessed with the dreams and instead of them getting closer to me and me to them, they would drift farther out to sea.

As I was dealing with this reality just a few days ago, I saw before me a great wall. It was the wall of my dreams. When I was a child it was just as large as it is now, but then I had a childlike attitude about it and it was the wall that was going to take me to another land, another world. And come to think of it, as a child, it didn’t look like a wall. It looked like a hill or the monkey bars at the park reserved for the bigger kids. But one day I would be a bigger kid too! And no, I did not dream of coming to France, at least I cannot remember that as being one of my dreams at that age, (even though I did read a lot of Barbara Cartland). Maybe it came later, in high school when I took a few mandatory-for-graduation French language courses. But this time when I saw the wall, I saw not something to be climbed. I saw something else I could not fathom. I saw something that was an obstacle. I saw . . . is that an idol? Can’t be.

The very thing(s) I desired and was pressing my way to achieve and accomplish had become the obstacle to my achievements and accomplishments. I should have recognized the symptoms years ago whenever anyone said something to me like “what if you never have children?”, or “what if you never record your music?”, and my reactions would be so strong and harsh. I would feel so much pain inside and anger and “how dare you say such a thing to me!”. I could not see my life without my dreams. Day and night, they would taunt me, torment me and harass me. They? Who? The dreams. Yes the very things I was trying to accomplish had turned against me, but I didn’t know this. I thought it was just the pain of suffering for the very thing one desired. But now I know, it was the pain of carrying inside my very soul something that could do nothing for me, but upon which I was giving my every breath to achieve. Like I was carrying the very thing that was supposed to carry me. Like trying to pull the car instead of driving it.

No wonder God told the Israelites in Deuteronomy 5:7 “Thou shalt have no other gods before ME or besides Me.” (Amplified) Lately I’ve been running into Psalm 135 quite a bit, and now I know why. Verses 15-18 describe our idols, our contemporary gods. I won’t record them all here, so you will have to read it on your own, but take a gander at this: verse 15 – “The idols of the nations are silver and gold, the work of men’s hands.” Well, I did plan to get rich and have about 3.5 houses on at least 2.75 continents, but most of my dreams were of marriage and family and music. Still “unless the Lord builds the house (whatever material is used for whatever kind of house, real or imagined) they labor in vain who build it.” (Psalm 127:1) I was building my house of dreams and my dream house. In my dreams. And with my sweat and tears, contracting pneumonia, stressing out my internal organs with worry, competition and fears of “what if. . .?”

Verse 16 says “[Idols] have mouths, but they speak not; eyes . . . see not; verse 17 “. . . ears, but . . . hear not.” Verse 18 is the scary one, “Those who make [idols] are like them; so is everyone who trusts in and relies on them.” Okay, I typed them for you ‘cause I just couldn’t get away from them.

Sometimes while walking the streets of Paris and other towns in France I’ve noticed statues in shops where you get your hair and nails done, also in restaurants. Certain ethnic groups of the Asian persuasion believe so much in these ‘gods’ and that they will bring them good fortune that they “host” them in their stores and homes. Well I really want to tell them it’s not the statues bringing them their fortunes, but “what is ‘customers’? for 300 Alex?” It’s my cash and your cash and everyone else’s cash that’s giving them their fortune. (I do like some of those fortune cookies though. LOL!!) Not those trinkets in the window. And if it were not for the mercy and grace of our Almighty Creator, none of us would be supporting anyone. But this is not about them. :-0

It is so important to have a dream and vision for our lives, but sometimes we can take it too far and it can become an obsession. An obsession becomes a limitation creating a bottle neck, slowing everything down, and eventually bringing all progress to a halt. Everything we do, whether we realize it or not, we do for the sake of the dream, but we still cannot seem to reach it. My prayers for my life for many years were within the context of accomplishing my dreams. There’s nothing wrong with having focused prayers, but there is something wrong when you expect and demand the Creator, the Author of our dreams to ‘obey’ you. I have since learned that this is not trust, but fear instead. Yes, many of us do it and we think we’re okay because we’re praying scriptures where God tells us to “Command ye ME”. Hi Ho Sliver!!! Whoa horsey!! Let me tell you where it is so you won’t think I made this one up. You can find this verse in Isaiah 45:11, “Thus says the Lord, The Holy One of Israel, and his Maker: Ask Me of things to come concerning My sons; And concerning the work of My hands, you command Me.” (emphasis mine) Now if He meant “ask” instead of “command” I’m sure He would have said “ask” because He did in the first part of the verse. Asking is making a request like “will you do . . .?” But to command someone is to tell him or her what to do, maybe how, when, where, with whom, what color, what size, ahem etc. You get my drift. J Anyhoooo . . . I know many will not agree with me, but that’s okay, this is a free world. At least it is for me. Mark 11:23 says (from Jesus’ mouth, o-kay): “Truly I tell you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be lifted up and thrown into the sea!’ and does not doubt at all in his heart but believes that what he SAYS will take place, it will be done for him.” Now I’m not for taking scripture out of context, so you need to read some of the verses before and after this one to understand WHY Jesus said this. Because this blog topic is so long I’m trying not to belabor this point. However and nevertheless, there is a period at the end of this verse. No comma and no colon and no semi-colon. To me that means to a certain degree His thought is complete. He didn’t stutter or have a second thought, and thus it is scriptures like this one which we churched people have lived by for so long and built our dreams and expectations and goals upon. We’ve been SAYING a lot of things and expecting them to happen. To SEE it is to SAY it and to SAY it is to SEE it. To me this is faith. In my dreams I saw what I wanted, and I said it to myself, to God and to anyone else who would listen or just eavesdrop. But still I missed it somewhere.

Whew. So, where am I now with all this dreaming stuff? Well, at first I was very uncomfortable to say the least because yes, I surrendered everything to my Lover Jesus the Christ. I don’t want to be guilty of worshiping anyone or anything but Him alone. But after I gave up my very life’s skeleton, I was tempted to be in fear, but I knew that wouldn’t help me. It was not an option or a desire. So what am I doing? I’m doing what I did as a child, but didn’t learn to do until I became an adult. Hmmm, what a confusing statement I know, but if you’ve been reading my blogs by now you’re used to me talking like this. And you’re still heeeere! LOL!! ;-) Thanks for hanging in there. Okay I’m spending quiet time with Jesus, sometimes talking and sometimes listening because He’s sometimes talking. I’m reading His written Word and focusing on what is real – His Spirit in my heart. He didn’t leave me floundering too long, maybe about a week, and then He began to share with me HIS dreams! I now fill that place of my imagination with thoughts of Him. It is a challenge because I still want to think about my dreams and . . .

Did you know that our Creator is the biggest Dreamer there is? His head is so big I’m sure He gets tired from keeping all that stuff to Himself, because He never sleeps. So He calls us and knocks on our doors, and sometimes He has to wait for us to go to sleep so He can download one of His dreams into our dreams and we wake up with a vision. Wow!! Yeah, those first few days I felt like I was walking around naked because I no longer knew what I am supposed to do, and why I’m on the earth. But if I had not experienced this “surrendering”, I would never know how it feels to have no hope. I would never know how it feels to have no dream or goal or vision for ones life. Now because I know how it feels I can have more compassion and patience with people I meet and pass on the streets who display lifelessness, hopelessness. Maybe I’ll have the courage enough to speak to them and give them a word, from the Lord, that will turn on the light in their hearts so they can believe beyond their current situation. God's dreams and thoughts about them - Jeremiah 29:11.

I saw a movie a few years ago called “Children and Their Dreams”. The young actress was pursuing her dream of being a singer in Hollywood. In spite of everything happening in her young life that was negative, she held onto her dream. The other young kids around her didn’t understand her, and two little boys fell in love with her. She awakened in them and a little black girl the desire to look beyond their current lives to see what they wanted to be and do, and could be and do. She sang these lyrics, which have also been recorded by Celine Dion: “I Have to Dream”

Verse 1

What lies before me, what stands between?

No one can tell me what I have seen.

Some see the tarnish, I see the gleam.

I have to wonder; I have to dream.

Verse 2

One dream can change you; one dream can make,

All the difference one heart can take.

I dream of flying in mid air.

I have to wonder, what’s up there?

Verse 3

The sky’s the limit, today’s the day;

Heavens are still there when skies are gray.

Some days are better than they seem.

Some days are better because you dream.

Chorus

On rainbows to rainbows, on starlight to star

To dream is what tomorrow’s for.

Only a dreamer knows what I know,

What it’s like to wonder, and then let go.

On rainbows to rainbows I know what I’ve seen.

I have to wonder, I have to dream.

Keep dreaming and doing what you can to realize your dreams, but don’t let your dreams become the roadblocks to the very thing you desire. When your dream crosses over to becoming an idol, your suitcase is too heavy. J

Peace.