Saturday 5 December 2009

Horse Chips

If you live long enough and travel outside of your neighborhood, city, state and country at least once, and stay away for any length of time . . . say, about a month at least, I can guarantee you will meet some special people along the way. What I mean by meet is you will become acquainted with people to the degree that you can make some fairly accurate conclusions about them without being judgmental, or critical. For instance, I’ve been away from what I grew up as being “home” for about five years now. I’m no longer residing in the country where I was born, so we can safely say I’m in another world.

Since being away I’ve met so many people, even some from my “neck of the woods”, or at least our woods may have connected over some common borders. One person in particular really believed that he had most of the answers (if not all) to solve everyone else’s problems, at least in theory. So he felt that he was right most of the time. I’m trying to be fair and not label him as an extremist, so I won’t say he felt he was right ALL of the time, even though when interacting with me this was the case. Anyhoooo, whenever one did not meet up to his expectations and standards and he wanted to know why or why not (depending on your perspective of the half-filled or half-empty glass), he would reject their explanations as “excuses”. However, whenever he dropped the ball when promising to perform a task for you, he always had a good REASON. Hmmm, to that I say “horse chips”.

There are so many different types of horses from different parts of the world, I couldn’t begin to name them all. Beautiful shiny blacks, whites, browns and reds, golden and mixed colors. Wow! This is one of the good reasons for watching western movies and documentaries of the western territories of the United States, to see the beautiful horses. Wars were fought because of horses (remember the Trojan Horse?), and also they were fought on the backs of horses. Many horses have saved peoples’ lives (The Lone Ranger's "Silver", and Black Beauty to name a few), and many have lost their lives for good and bad reasons. Horses are not only beautiful but intelligent animals. They can sense fear in humans and they know their owner’s scent and voice. They have excellent memories and impeccable hearing. They know how to lead and to follow, and they know how to find their way home. They can be trained. (James 3:3)

Horses have a lot in common with people too. They’re sensitive and they have five senses. They have their own language and they have to mate in order to procreate. They eat and sleep, drink and play. They walk and run and they know how to play tricks too (watch the circus). Just like humans, hours after they eat, they have to let go of the stuff they’ve eaten. You get my drift don’t you? You don’t have to be rocket scientists, lawyers, Indian Chiefs or doctors. Just, human. ;-) Let’s just call them “horse chips”.

Just like there are many different types of horses in the world, there are now several different types of chips and chip companies. For instance, potato chips, rice chips, corn chips, black and blue chips, with and without salt. Stackable chips, broken chips, Pringle’s, Lay’s, some generic names, and Frito-Lay. We all have visited the world of chips in our favorite super markets. Now there seems to be almost a chip for every type of person on the earth. Sugar-free and salt-free chips, vinegar and salt chips, pickled chips, you name them, men and women have fried, baked, sliced, tye-dyed, dried and tried them. And just as many people as there are in the world, there are also just as many horse chips.

What are horse chips anyway? Well, I knew I would never forget what they are once my fifth grade teacher taught us the meaning of the word. (And she loved the wild west too!) And guess what, whenever she put them on a test (not the chips!), we all got it right!! LOL!! Okay. Hmmm, horse chips are those things horses no longer have need of at the end of the day, yet in the places they leave them behind, the grass and vegetation seems to grow mighty fine. ;-) Sounds like a line for a country song doesn’t it? LOL!!! That’s the literal definition of HCs. Now on the social side I refer to “horse chips” as those stories we all tell when we cannot tell the truth, or we don’t want our truth to be known by others because it’s so ludicrous or ridiculous (did you notice that you spell both of those words with the same letters?), or we just don’t have a really good enough reason to explain ourselves. You see what I mean? Some people refer to them as “BS”, and others as “n’importe quoi” en Francaise. I’ve heard other expressions too – poppy cock and “I ain’t buying it”. Oh well, I guess it depends of course upon where you were born, and how your familiars expressed their frustration. Or where you find yourself in the present; right now, no one I know expresses their frustration as “horse chips”.

I say "horse chips" when people try to make me think I was born yesterday just because I’m new to the current situation and scenario. "Horse chips" when they’re always right and you’re always wrong. "Horse chips" when arguments are one-sided and lack focus, yet you’re being forced to swallow them hook, line and sinker and make major life-changing decisions upon. "Horse chips" when what’s good for the goose IS NOT good for the gander. "Horse chips" when the pot wants to call the kettle black. "Horse chips" when it’s quacking like a duck but they’re trying to convince you it’s a dog. Both begin with the letter “d”, but that’s about all. "Horse chips" when the only one worth hearing is always the one doing all the talking, but never listening. "Horse chips" when men are the only ones who can become angry and show it because it’s not “lady-like” for women to display their anger. "Horse chips" when people insist this is a “man’s world”, but he’s always looking for the perfect woman. If it’s a man’s world, then men don’t need women. "Horse chips" when women insist they have to be naked to prove they’re beautiful. "Horse chips" when people insist that white is always right while all other colors of the world are inferior. "Horse chips" when people conclude that racism is the major problem of the world when in fact “fear” is the foundational problem of human existence. All the others are just pawns on the chess board.

"Horse chips" when it’s not cool to be your real self. "Horse chips" when people say "I love you" and then turn around and abuse, accuse, and misuse you. "Horse chips" when others insist you do what they’re not willing to do, or you will lose your job, home, etc. "Horse chips" are those “excuses” we all put out there and hide behind, and blame others in order to keep from doing what we know is right. "Horse chips" when thieves in black, grey and navy blue suits and ties tell their victims “we did it for your own good”. "Horse chips" when politicians push for laws they refuse to live by, or think don't apply to them. They're for the "underbeings". "Horse chips" are what keep boys inside men’s bodies and little girls walking around in 44D bras trying to convince the world “this is how we do it” i.e. the adult thing. "Horse chips" are what cause people to say “the devil made me do it” and then turn around and say “God doesn’t exist”. "Horse chips" are the stupid statements that God is causing our troubles and then "where is God when we need Him?" "Horse chips" are put out by those who believe you should do as they say and not as they do. What happened to leading by example? Horses do. And do. ;-)

Could it be the reason our society is suffering from split and multiple personalities is because of all the "horse chips" put out generation after generation, creating horse chip landmines called “laws”, and now we’re trying not to step on them moment by moment lest we get blown up, as we try to live in our homes, raise our families, work our jobs and have a little fun on the range? (Where the dear – yeah I know – and the antelope play . . .) After so many years of saying what we don’t mean and doing what we didn’t say, and meaning what we thought we did, gheesh, hmmm bipolar, schizophrenia, dementia, anger, rage, depression, fear, etc. you name it, begin to create the normal dysfunctional society. What then, could possibly be the answer? Well, lest I sound like the semi-extremist I described at the beginning of this monologue, the answer lays with the One Who created our universe, (and I believe He has deserved the right to be Extreme in every way.). In Holy Scriptures He has spoken these words, “A double-minded man (person) is unstable in all his/her ways.” (James 1:8) Now even in regular English, or whatever language you prefer, this is not difficult to understand.

Double means . . . duh “for 400, what is two Alex?” Your mind. Now, hmmm that’s a more difficult one. A person who says what he means, means what he says and whose actions line up with his words and thoughts, is a focused person. Multi-taskers may refer to this person as having a “one-track mind”, but I believe that is better than having two tracks and your brain, I mean train derails because at the crossroads you cannot make up your mind on which one to send it. Whatever you believe in your heart or mind about anything, then your words and actions should match that, otherwise why do you believe it? We put out horse chips when we believe one thing, say another thing, and do something entirely not in line with the former two. That’s when we appear to be a person with multiple personalities. Yeah and we say “appearances can be deceiving”. That’s exactly what we’re talking about here. Deception, lies, untruths. In order to get others to believe it, you must first believe it yourself. Horse chips.

It’s time for us to tell the truth, first to ourselves, then to everyone else. There is however, ONE person in the universe we can lie to, but He’s never snowed over, and that is God. He’s never deceived and neither does He deceive. And He knows just how to reveal all those horse chips. It’s called “heat”. LOL!! When the heat is on, the truth comes out. Hay, I’m not a horse and if you’re reading this you aren’t either (unless you’re Mr. Ed, of course). Neither am I a chip manufacturer. Are you? But if we catch ourselves, or each other putting out chips which benefit no one, or only someONE, we need to put ourselves out of business. I don’t think anyone wants to buy Horse Chips by Frito-You, Frito-Me, or Frito-They. I ain’t buying it. Crunch!!

No comments:

Post a Comment